I have begun to realize that if I want to do something, I can't count on others to do them with me, or to ask me to do something with them, so I am now just doing it on my own. Being the co-dependant that I am I don't often enjoy doing things on my own, so I have really been branching out.
The first thing on my list to try on my own was MOPS (mother's of preschoolers), 2 years ago and that has worked out wonderfully and I have made some great friends.
And that was basically it for the past 2 years, short of going to the store and getting my eyebrows waxed, I haven't done anything on my own.
So a few months ago, for the umpteenth time, I was again upset because a friend did something I wanted to do w/out me. So I prayed about it and decided to find the courage to do things on my own. I have made a list of interests etc. and have started to tackle it.
Now, every Tuesday morning I take Garrett to the local library for their toddler story/song time and then to the park after to play. It has been such a rewarding experience for me to see his growth from these story times. He now sings along with the songs and knows the hand movements. He now sits quietly and listens to the story being read. In contrast to the the first few times when he would just sort of run around the room etc.
Last week I took my very first cooking class. Cooking and baking have always been a passion of mine. Something I have enjoyed doing as long as I can remember. After I was married I even toyed w/ the idea of going to Culinary School, but Eric and I thought it would be wasting money since I would just being staying home once we had a child. So, when I read an article about local cooking schools last February I jumped at the chance to take a class. Again, I asked a couple people to take it with me and of course they said no. At first I was upset thinking, once again I won't be able to do something I really want to do because no one will go with me, then it hit me GO ALONE! So, I called and registered. When Eric came home that evening and found out he was shocked and sad for me to have to go alone, but also impressed that I decided to do it. It was such a great experience, that I have decided to try to take one class every month, schedule permitting.
By being fearful of doing things on my own I have really been missing out on wonderful new experiences and meeting new people through them. God is stretching me and I like it!
It does make me sad however to not have a friend to enjoy these things with, but God is always teaching me something new, so here's to losing my co-dependence and gaining some independence. Courage through Christ!